Oscar Night!

Sleeping through the Oscars: Has the Academy gone crazy?

By: Heather Johnson

Sunday, February 27^th the 83^rd Academy Awards aired on ABC giving us an up-close and personal seat on the red carpet for the Super Bowl of Hollywood awards! However, I think I saw it better in my sleep than I did on TV.

This year the hosts for the night of festivities were Anne Hathaway and James Franco. Now, anyone who watched could tell that Hathaway worked her butt off and did her best to as they said “bring in a younger demographic.” Franco on the other hand, his performance was almost as bad as the 1995 Letterman/Host episode, in fact I may have even rather listened to Roseanne sing the Star Spangled Banner again! It was as if he had better things to do than host, and added no input to Hathaway’s struggling one-liners. By far the most boring moments of the night. Sure, their entrance ran on line with past montages. They inserted themselves into the night’s nominations for Best Picture, and even had a lil help from last year host Alec Baldwin, and the great Morgan Freeman but they seemed to be the best part, though personally, using Back To The Future was very ingenious, especially after the leak of them doing Grease which appeared last week on the internet.

Thankfully we got a break from this half way through as Billy Crystal was introduced to a standing ovation as he took us on a look back at the first ever televised Academy Awards show. Making note that the host of that night, Bob Hope, had hosted 18 times in his life, whereas Crystal holds a booming 8 honorable nights. Though it was rather awkward they projected a Bob Hope hologram and had voiceover actors act on behalf of him and introduce Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law.

The night had aspirations at the beginning; the first host of the night was Tom Hanks, who gave out the award for Best Art Direction (Alice in Wonderland) and Best Cinematography (Inception- their first win of the night). The next presenter got nothing short of yet another standing ovation as Kirk Douglas, who was almost still incoherent from his stroke a few years back, presented the award for Best Supporting Actress. He did however provide a great few moments of comedy, keeping the ladies on their seats with suspense as to who won the award. In the end Melissa Leo won for her role in The Fighter, which proved to have gotten into her head as she became the first person of the night to drop the F-Bomb. It was ok though, because it became one of the only running jokes of the entire evening. Though, I do have to say, she looked like a disco doily, what was she thinking with that lace dress and who starched her collar?

A little mystery came next as Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis presented Best Animated Feature (Toy Story 3) and Best Animated Short (The Lost Thing) but kept making reference to the movie Exit Through The Gift Shop’s elusive director, Banksey. According to The Hollywood Reporter he had many attendees guessing whether he was going to the show in disguise. Mr. Brainwash, aka Thierry Guetta (star of Exit) told THR on the red carpet that “He’s here, but you’ll never know.” Wonder if anyone figured out that it was Timberlake or if it was just me?

Keeping the night going awards for Best Adapted Screenplay (The Social Network) and best Original Screenplay (The King’s Speech) brought around no surprise as these winners were favorites to win this year. Though it seemed as if the awards hit a lull, Hathaway showed up on stage in a tuxedo and sang her version of Les Miserable “On My Own”, which was an ode to Hugh Jackman whom she says “bailed out on their duet at the last minute.” By far one of her most humorous moments of the night. Though why Franco felt he needed to come out in a hot pink strapless dress and make a Charlie Sheen joke was beyond me and the critics. Franco, go get changed, you’re not funny enough to pull off drag. Though this was not the end of embarrassing moments for the show, the announcer audibly stumbled on Reese Witherspoon’s name, which presented the award for Best Supporting Actor (Christian Bale-The Fighter). Though Witherspoon, despite the stumble on her name, was simply beautiful!

Best Original Score was presented to The Social Network to Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross. How surprised was I to find Reznor in a suit, clean cut, and short haired?! He shed his “Nine Inch Nails” to accept his Oscar. Inception swept the next two awards for Sound Mixing and Sound Editing, which of course is always the biggest lull in the show. Hoping the Makeup category would spice things up along with the costume portion, I was highly disappointed to find that Cate Blanchett, who herself looked like something out of a horror movie (what was she thinking with that purple and yellow shower curtain), was presenting these awards. The Wolfman won for makeup (not after Blanchett made a comment that it was disgusting) and Alice in Wonderland beat out the King’s Speech and True Grit for costumes. Guess there was one advantage to having Helena Bowman Carter’s head that big.

We were treated to live performances for Best Original Song, though presented by two separate people, Kevin Spacey for the first two and Jennifer Hudson for the remainder. And how awkward was it that Hudson called Gwyneth Paltrow country music’s next big star? I doubt the country genre will be holding a spot in the Grand Ole Opry for her just yet. The incoherent performance by Randy Newman for “We Belong Together” from Toy Story 3 won the category, though he did keep a light note about him joking in his speech by saying “I'm very grateful for this and surprised. My percentages aren't great. I've been nominated 20 times and this is the 2nd time I won. At the Academy, at the lunch they have for the nominees, where they have like a Randy Newman chicken by this time.” That makes him the Susan Lucci of Oscar music.

As the night continued to drag on the awards for Best Visual Effects (Inception) and Best Film Editing (Social Network) were given out only prolonging the wait till the real awards of the night. However, we were treated at this time to the “Memoriam” section of the night, which shunned some actors and highlighted a mere 24 people instead of last year’s 36. Celine Dion came on stage and performed the song “Smile” beautifully as we watched the slide show. Stars such as Tony Curtis, Gloria Stewart (the old lady from Titanic), Leslie Nielson, Lynn Redgrave, Dennis Hopper and Lena Horn were honored. This included a dedication by Halle Berry to Lena Horn who was the first African-American woman to sign a long term contract with any studio. However, where was Corey Haim? Overlooked by the Academy that’s where, even in death.

The biggest awards are always Director, Actor/Actress and of course, Best Picture. So as the wait went on, Best Director was given to Tom Hooper for the King’s Speech, no surprise there. However, he was nice enough to mention his newly founded “bromance” in his acceptance speech, “Thank you to my wonderful actors. The triangle of man love which is Colin Firth, Geoffrey Rush, and me.” Truly a nice way to lighten up the dull mood.

Best Actress was presented by last year’s winner and nominee again this year, Jeff Bridges. Though all the ladies nominated were well worth the award, Natalie Portman won for her role in Black Swan. Sandra Bullock presented the flipside for Best Actor, which regretfully skipped Bridges this year and was awarded to Colin Firth for his amazing role in The King’s Speech. Franco, who was nominated for 127 Hours, looked as if he was going to cry backstage, maybe that’s why he skipped the Hollywood after parties!

So who took home the whole shebang? Best Picture was of course given it’s ten nominations: Black Swan, Inception, Toy Story 3, The King’s Speech, The Fighter, The Social Network, True Grit, The Kids are All Right, 127 Hours and Winters Bone were all up for the award. Alas, the Kings Speech won making it the fourth Oscar win of the night, out of its twelve nominations. Inception brought home three for the night and the Social Network four, making it a night of no mouth gasping upsets.

So what do we do to close out the awards this year? We bring in PS 22 from Staten Island to sing “Somewhere Over The Rainbow” with all the winners. Eh, I could have done without this. Overall I roll in my red carpet, thank Ryan Seacrest for the fantastic carpet interviews, and hope to the movie gods that next year’s hosts and awards will be far more appealing then this round. Stay Tuned…